Name/Tumblr url: Dziko (Silentdeee)

Height/Size: 5’11”; US 22/24

How did you discover HAES? Through various tumblogs

What does living a healthy life entail for you? A balanced combination of a healthy diet and consistent exercising. Its taken me many years to find what works for me. I have been a pescatarian (a vegetarian who still incorporates fish in their diet) since April of 2009 and it has definitely encouraged me to make healthier eating choices. Ive learned to love going to the gym (when I can, unfortunately) and doing cardio for about 30-45 mins as well as weight lifting. 

What are some of your favorite foods? My favorite food to eat is pasta and fruit. I could eat fruit practically all day if I could!

What are your favorite ways to be active? I love to either be outside or do active activities where I dont realize Im exercising lol like Zumba, for example. I fell in love with it over the summer, even though the first couple of classes kicked my butt! My favorite machines to get on at the gym is a tie between the elliptical and the bikes. I feel wonderful afterwards on either of them.

What makes you feel strong?  When I can follow through with a goal that I set out to do. Its wonderful to have people telling you they have noticed a positive difference in you and being able to get them motivated to do the same. It definitely fuels me to keep up the progress.

Emotional health matters too! What do you do to center/care for yourself emotionally? I have definitely found encouraging messages throughout tumblr to basically love yourself no matter what. I have a wonderful network of family and friends who enable me to comfortable with the way I am. I’ve learned over the past couple of years how to appreciate having alone time to continue to learn and understand myself and to carefully choose who I keep close to me. I find that just being around good company who understands my crazy is a very vital part of my emotional health and they keep me level headed.

Describe a moment when you felt less than great about your body: I didnt always have the motivation to dress up and I would always feel so self-conscious because I thought since I was fat, I didnt have the nerve to dress pretty. But I have learned that I feel better about myself when I pay closer attention to how I dress and present myself and I can walk around with a lot more confidence because I know that I look good. :)

What was a moment when you felt particularly empowered/body positive? When I learned that I didnt have to lose weight to feel beautiful. I have my moments from time to time, but being able to admit to yourself that you are beautiful, and mean it, is a very liberating thing. Ive wasted time hating and loathing myself because people, in more or less subtle ways, constantly told me I would be so much more beautiful if just lost weight. I may never lose 100 lbs, so why do I need to waste time sabotaging my self-worth to be beautiful for someone else? 

Any advice? Focus on how awesome you are! Dont worry about the next person who thinks they know your life and how you need to live it. Hello? its your life! Learn things about yourself that are conducive to your mental, physical and emotional health. No one knows what that is exactly better than yourself! I feel that taking time to know what the right foods to eat and the proper physical activity that is best for you is so worth while. Its an ongoing process but it makes the journey to a better you much more fulfilling. I may never be able to lose the amount of weight that I want but I have adapted a healhier way of living that I believe has enhanced my quality of life. =)

Thanks, Dziko! I recently fell in love with Zumba, too. It is the most fun I’ve had in while!

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Name/Tumblr url:  Maja/alt0151.tumblr.com

(I blog pseudonymously and prefer not to associate my photo with my tumblr account!)

 Height/Size: 5”4, 170ish lbs. XLs and 14s, generally.

How did you discover HAES? A couple of years back, I started reading Kate Harding’s blog and shouting “YES YES YES” at my screen. I think I’ve always had the sense that our culture handles health/size/food/weight in a perverse way, and here was someone writing about exactly how that plays out in a sensible and engaging way. I never looked back!

What does living a healthy life entail for you? I’m 27, and I’ve had type 1 diabetes for almost 20 years. Living a healthy life takes some doing, but of course the effort is worth it. I manage my blood sugar and insulin intake, eat food with an eye towards keeping my blood sugar happy, and try not to stress (which has been 2011’s big project,  and it’s going pretty well!). I’d like to exercise more than I do, so I’m aiming to add more of that. Oh, and getting enough sleep! It’s so key, and I always forget until I am good and cranky.

What are some of your favorite foods? I snack on kettlecorn, celery, and string cheese. I love rice-based dishes and am pining after a shmancy rice-cooker. I put too much ginger and lime in everything. And I genuinely like salads, as long as they’re interesting and substantial.

What are your favorite ways to be active? I just got a new bike and am thrilled; it’s about half the weight of my old bike, so I’m much faster now, and less clumsy. I can’t wait for spring and the months and months of riding that will herald. In the meantime, I’ve been curious about yoga… and there’s always long walks (or, SIGH, trudges through the snow).

What makes you feel strong? Great question! Keeping up with my boyfriend when we’re biking (he’s a million feet tall and has an advantage!). Having a day of good blood sugars — no major highs or lows. Making the right call on something health-related (or anything at all, really). Being able to help others. Singing.

Emotional health matters too! What do you do to center/care for yourself emotionally? I’m a talker — I call my mom, my close friends, my boyfriend, and I talk out what’s bugging me. (But not so much that I get stuck in it!) I see a therapist, and I’m on a low dose of an anti-anxiety med, which was super-helpful for me once I realized that I needed it. Most of all, I try to be aware of when I’m feeling overwhelmed so that I can give myself some chill-out time. And sleep. Did I mention sleep? If I don’t get enough sleep, I become a fire-breathing troll-ogre hybrid who eats you for breakfast.

Describe a moment when you felt less than great about your body: Oh man, this. My mom and I have a great relationship, but of course we don’t see eye to eye on everything, including what the significance of size is. I put on a bit of weight in the last year and was feeling pretty good about what I was doing to accept that change in size… until, on a visit home, my mom gave me a tough-love talk about how I needed “to love myself enough to lose the weight” and that my weight gain “just isn’t healthy.” We hashed it out (and yes, there was some crying and some shouting), and I know that she’s on board with the way I’m managing my health, if not HAES as a complete concept. But her comments stuck with me, and now I’m all icky-concerned about what to wear to Thanksgiving, and whether she’s going to criticize my body or my choices of clothes/food. I am… not delighted about that. But she loves me, and my body is just fine, paunch and all. We will deal — and enjoy ourselves, even.

What was a moment when you felt particularly empowered/body positive? My brother got married last summer, on the beach, at a place with no air-conditioning — this fattie’s nightmare. It was my first major event since discovering HAES, so preparing for it was like a primer in body acceptance — feel good in your skin, dress how you want, screw the haters. I abandoned the idea of wearing shapewear — not in that heat! — discovered the anti-chafe sticks that runners use, wore three beautiful dresses throughout the weekend, swam, snorkeled, hiked, danced the night away, and felt fantastic the whole time.

Any advice? If someone tells you your body is not okay, fart on them. Silly things, like fart jokes, are an effective, if not universally effective, way to stay positive. Growth is hard! So if you’re all, “what is wrong with me — why is this so hard?”, that’s why. There’s nobody looking out for you 100% except you, so take care of yourself. This includes fart jokes.

Thanks for sharing, Maja! I think biking is a great way to work out, I’ve actually been looking into purchasing one. And mothers can definitely be difficult in this process of body peace, as I’m sure many of us know.

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Name/Tumblr url: Rachel/ThatPhatGurlRay.tumblr.com

Height/Size:5’4/ 18-20

How did you discover HAES? I discoverd it through Tumblr.

What does living a healthy life entail for you? Making Healthy food choices adding more veggies and fruits into my food choices and exercising. I am not one to eat my veggies or even pick them out when eating at a restaurant but after doing a 30 day vegetarian challenge I realized how much better I felt with my food choices. 

What are some of your favorite foods? I love Chinese! lol As well as Rice, Shrimp, Chicken, and Sweets of course!

What are your favorite ways to be active? I love lifting weights! Weight has always been my favortie way to stay motivated but I also have incorporated some cardio as well even though I hate cardio, running, walking, or anything that I feel is just “BLAH” as I like to say but I have learned to make it exciting by walking with my nieces and making it a race or taking my dogs to venture through the neighbor hood.

What makes you feel strong? When I set a goal for myself and I reach or surpass my goal weather it is walking through the park or drinking more water that day. When I am realistic with myself and my goals in life it is easier to continue to make the right choices in all aspects of life!

Emotional health matters too! What do you do to center/care for yourself emotionally? When I feel down or when Im having a rough day I turn to support systems like this tumblr. seeing others loving themselves is one of the best ways to keep you going! I get inspirations for recipes, OOTD, and just general support from people who can understand what I may be going through or how I may be feeling.

Describe a moment when you felt less than great about your body: All through grade school I played sports so I was a smaller thick girl after high school I got caught up with work and school full time that I never made the right food choices and never was active. A couple of months ago I looked in the mirror and ask myself what I had done to my body. Thats when I started turning to motivational people and sites like this one. I learned to love myself and not to stress about what happened through the last years but to move forward and taking a stand to a healthier me.

What was a moment when you felt particularly empowered/body positive? When I was at the gym and I had walked/jogged for 30mins and I didn’t want to stop! lol I know it sounds silly but for a girl who HATES cardio that was a true defining moment for me! It empowered me to continue to make good choices and stay active!

Any advice? Love yourself for who you are and not for what you can become! in order for you to reach your goals you have to start with loving what you are at this very moment! And remember being healthy doesn’t mean you are a size 3 and weight 120lbs its about making good food choices, being active weather that’s a jog in the park or 10mins playing with kids, and always always always find your motivation and keep motivated everyday!

Thanks for sharing, Rachel. I think “love yourself for who you are and not for what you can become” is a solid piece of advice; it’s going on my mirror!

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Name/Tumblr url:  Malika Hope http://afrosoulsista.tumblr.com/

Height/Size: 5’8.5” 317lbs / Before I started on my Weight loss journey I weighed 403lbs I wore a 30/32 but for the most part I was 26/28 for a long time…Now that I have had the Gastric Sleeve and Lost over 80lbs I don’t know what size I really am…I still wear my old clothes though.

How did you discover HAES?  Tumblr

What does living a healthy life entail for you? Its starts with my choice of food, sometimes I have these cravings that are out of this world, and they are not always healthy. Being Post Op Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy there are certain things that I have to maintain.  Proper protein intake as well as lots and lots of water keep me where I need to be with being “on track”. Exercising is a major factor but I will admit I have been a little lazy, but Im working on getting back at it. I don’t smoke or drink (most people forget that its unhealthy to do that and just focus on people being overweight) so that keeps everything else working fine..

What are some of your favorite foods? Sushi, Bananas, Sautéed Mushrooms, Oysters, Guacamole, Shrimp…honestly I love all things GOOD!!

What are your favorite ways to be active? I really enjoy going to the lake and doing my 2 mile walks. I have incorporated a little big of jogging but my bewbs are the problem, I have managed to find a shirt that is tight enough to keep them from being all over the place. I am looking forward to getting a bike so there won’t be as much impact on my knee that was dislocated. I find exercising outside gives me more motivation and allow for me to be more comfortable with being seen as a BIG GIRL WORKING OUT in PUBLIC

What makes you feel strong? When Other girls/women come to me with questions, I feel like I am doing something right. Being a support system for people who need that extra push gives me great joy. There are times when I see posts on Tumblr where people are just fishing for compliments or where others are really having a hard. Either way, I address both of them with the same care and attention that I would want someone to do with me.

Emotional health matters too! What do you do to center/care for yourself emotionally?  I surround my self around family and friends, I laugh as much as possible and every decision that I make is based on how it will affect my happiness…Those things are most important to me so that’s how I stay a float. Being an emotional eater is no longer an option.

Describe a moment when you felt less than great about your body: When an old cowoker and I were talking he said to me

“anyway - i will go now- but i wanna just say that I am SO proud of you!!!!!! wow! you can’t even tell someone how you were so large you could hardly get around and now you are so into fitness and are such a great example - it just makes me love you so much because of your brain being so after the goal - I admire you - ok bye bye babe”

What he failed to remember was that when I was unable to get around, it was due to a dislocated knee and not my weight. That hurt my feelings in so many different ways its unexplainable.

What was a moment when you felt particularly empowered/body positive? From time to time I go back and look at my videos on youtube and see the old me…I see the major differences and I am thankful that I had the surgery, as well as made the sacrifices to get my life together..

Any advice? Take one day at a time. Don’t do anything that you don’t want to or that you feel you are not ready for. Don’t beat yourself up over something that you have no control over and work on being positive about yourself and your situation (whatever you are dealing with) Set short and long time goals. I have found that it helps you keep spirits high. Try new things. Smile. Laugh. Love. 

Thanks for sharing, Malika! That is my favorite picture of you. Seeing you post about your workouts keeps me motivated.

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I got a few questions, from some babes who would rather not be named about confidence and loving yourself. I felt that it was important enough to merit it’s own post, so here we go.

In my experience, the single most important part of living a healthy life is removing the toxic and decidedly unhealthy influence of self-deprecation. Making any changes to your body or lifestyle out of hatred for your current state doesn’t tend to yield many positive results.

In a healthy parent-child relationship, the parent loves the child unconditionally - through all of the many changes and blunders the child experiences. It doesn’t mean that they aren’t ever disappointed or saddened by the child, but they don’t let any of those emotions last and overshadow the love they have for their child.

In this same way, we should love ourselves and our bodies, through thick and thin, literally. Our lifestyle changes should come from a place of love and respect for our bodies. Eat fruit and get active because it will make you feel great, not to punish yourself for gaining a few pounds. This kind of positive mentality will breed good vibes and confidence in all areas of your life. It’s all well and good to make changes, but love yourself before, during and after.

Be gentle with yourself, and love the skin you are you are in. After all, it’s the only one you’ve got!

Name/Tumblr url: 

Barbara! My tumblr is touch-too-much.tumblr.com

Height/Size: 

I am 1.64/5’4 and size…42 european pants

How did you discover HAES? 

I follow the beautiful babe who created it!

What does living a healthy life entail for you? 

Making the right choices that in the end are going to benefit your body but most of all just being happy and content and stop wishing for things we don’t have. 

What are some of your favorite foods?

Pastas, bread, meat, broccoli, yogurt!

What are your favorite ways to be active? 

Dance, dance, dance!

What makes you feel strong?

Keeeping my head up high and those amazing days in which I feel content with who I am. 

Emotional health matters too! What do you do to center/care for yourself emotionally? 

I listen to a lot of music and also I rant a lot to myself. I just talk about my feelings to myself just to get it out there and most of all I always try to be honest about everything I say. 

Describe a moment when you felt less than great about your body:

Oh dear, many moments starting from 8th grade! But a moment that is marked in my head is once I was studying for mid-terms (9th grade I think) in my underwear and I started to cry and wrote FAT all over my body…that was a real low in my life. 

What was a moment when you felt particularly empowered/body positive?

Buying the dress in this picture is a very recent moment. Those tight skirts usually don’t look that great on me and I just ADORED this dress and I cannot wait to wear it out! I felt amazing about my body that day….I also bought a bikini that day so it was just amazing. 

Any advice?

Don’t be harsh on yourself if you have a bad day. We are all bound to have bad days but don’t let those bad days mark the rest of the days to come. Everyday is a clean slate and you alone can choose how to feel!!

P.S: I have a fitness blog as well for anyone interested! imstrongerthanithinkiam.tumblr.com

Thanks Barb! That dress looks amazing on you, I hope you go out and stir up some birthday trouble in it.

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Name/Tumblr URL: howdy TFF! i’m rachel. scrawledoutdreams.

Height/Size: well, in my head i’m five foot nine, but i’m really five eleven or so. at the moment i wear a size 20/22.

TFF: How did you discover HAES?

well, through the lovely woman that made this blog! i wasn’t really thinking much about it until i started following her and seeing how fantastically she was eating and i had to do it too! i took it as a personal goal for myself to expose myself to healthier foods and create a better equilibrium between my mental and physical health.

TFF: What does living a healthy life entail for you?

not eating everything in sight. no, really! i’m serious. i come from a family where thick and fattening foods has always been the game, and it was about time i tapped out. living a healthy life for me really includes working out on a regular basis, keeping my emotional health at a constant state of well no matter WHAT may be going on in life, and putting food in my body that came from nature instead of a factory.

TFF: What are some of your favorite foods?

i’m a REALLY big sucker for sweets, so i’m currently looking for alternatives to that. if you’re reading this and have suggestions, leave them here in my ask box! i really like comforting foods - things that are hot and leave you feeling content and happy after eating.

TFF: What makes you feel strong?

hearing other people’s journeys on this HAES process. hearing other people hear how great they’re doing consistently motivates me to do better for myself. also, being told i’m an inspiration is pretty nice, too. (:

TFF: Emotional health matters too! What do you do to center/care for yourself emotionally?

i listen to music that makes me feel good. no matter what it may be, music has always comforted me. i take time out of my day to sit and concentrate on all the good things i have going on in my life. I’m starting to get into meditation and writing, and i’ll definitely keep you all updated on that!

TFF: Describe a moment you felt less than great about your body:

every single time i realized that i had to go up a size in any clothes. it’s possibly the worst feeling seeing a bigger number than you want.

TFF: What was a moment when you felt particularly empowered/body positive?

finally realizing that that number does NOT define me. i am a beautiful individual and a number can never dictate that for me.

TFF: Any advice?

keep going. stay strong. remember that you’re beautiful and if you decide you wanted to fly out of your bedroom window, you could do it. you can do anything. i love you guys. if you ever want to talk, i’m here. happy eating! (:

Thanks Rachel! You look amazing in that photo. And you all can thank her for being the first to submit for Music Monday :)

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Name/Tumblr url: Ashley / funkthat

Height/Size: 5’7, about 230 lbs

How did you discover HAES?

The lovely uhfrayedknot! :) (ModNote: That’s me, guys! Awww..)

What does living a healthy life entail for you?  

Eating right, and when possible, exercising. I do take stairs instead of elevators, I do take my dogs on long walks, and when I have the time, I do the elliptical, run for miles on the treadmill, and lift weights.

What are some of your favorite foods?

I like a ton of food, but my favorite would definitely have to be Spicy Black Bean Vegetarian burgers, on a flat wrap with a slice of cheese. delicious! (and only 5 points for anyone who does weight watchers!)

What are your favorite ways to be active?

I LOVE taking my dogs on walks. I live right in front of a battlefield in Virginia, so we have trails right in front of our house. I walk them all the time!

What makes you feel strong?

Having such a strong support system, including friends. My family has never been very supportive until recently when they’ve started to see my weight loss start to happen. My friends and coworkers always tell me how beautiful I am, and how much of a great person I am, and no matter how I feel, it always makes my day a little bit better. :)

Emotional health matters too! What do you do to center/care for yourself emotionally?

I definitely take time for myself. No matter what’s going on, I make sure that I can do what I need to do to make sure that I am happy. Whether it be taking a break from homework to take a bubble bath to relax, or going on a walk to clear my mind.

Describe a moment when you felt less than great about your body:

There was a point in time when I was at my heaviest, and I was so disappointed when I found out not only had I gone up one pants size, but I went up two. Since then I’ve been back down to the size I was originally at (and possibly even a size smaller now!) and I definitely feel better, but it was just a bit of a shock for me. It happened in early high school, when numbers mattered most. Since then I’ve learned that it doesn’t matter what the number on the tag says. I wish I would have known that back then so I wouldn’t have been upset! Any size is beautiful!

What about a moment when you felt particularly empowered/body positive?

One of my most body positive/empowering moments was when my dad told me that I looked great, and that he noticed how I was starting to lose weight. My dad was never someone to really support me, and instead I grew up with him yelling at me that I was fat, lazy, ugly, etc. We never had a great relationship until I took my health into my own hands. He said to keep it up, because I’m an inspiration for him to lose weight. He has many health problems (high blood pressure, heart problems) and has doctors telling him he needs to lose weight so he can help prevent heart attacks, etc. (he’s 6’0 and 350+ lbs). I won’t forget that day. :) 

Any advice?

It’s okay to be fat and healthy! I have PCOS, and an option to help with this problem, they strongly suggested losing weight. I didn’t have to, but they strongly suggested it because it would help prevent further complications such as diabetes and more cysts. For my own health, I decided to go ahead and lose weight because in the long run, I would be healthiest. It doesn’t mean I have to be skinny, I just have to lose a little weight! So do what you need to do to be healthy, because you don’t have to be skinny to be healthy! Stay beautiful, girls!

Thanks Ashley! For some people, losing a bit of weight can definitely turn around certain health problems. I’m so glad that you’re feeling healthy and you look gorgeous!

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